Commitment, Courage, Capability, Confidence
Dan Sullivan has a profound framework that he calls ‘The 4 C’s’ that can be applied to any progress you make in your life. These are: Commitment, Courage, Capability, Confidence. His premise is simple: Most people want to feel capable and confident in order to go after what they want in life. However, there’s no getting to these without going through the very uncomfortable realm of courage.
I went through this exact process recently.
I froze my eggs. This process involves chemically controlling your hormones to make your ovaries grow as many mature eggs as possible so they can be retrieved via a needle through your vaginal wall and frozen for later use. This process involved all kinds of things I don’t like: shots, blood draws, going under anesthesia, taking lots of prescriptions. I’m in awe of folks who self-inject daily for their health needs and women who’ve done IVF.
Here’s my experience mapped onto the 4 C’s:
Commitment: After going back and forth for years about if I wanted to freeze my eggs, I finally asked myself the right question: What’s the worst case scenario? Wasted money. What’s the best case scenario? The potential to have a healthy child later on and giving my current relationship more time to flourish.
My WHY just had to be bigger than my why not.
Courage: The EXTRA SUPER HARD PART. As a lifelong ‘delicate flower’ with shots and blood draws, I was dubious (at best) about my ability to inject myself with 2-3 shots per day for 10-12 days.
In the beginning, I struggled. The medication stung and drew blood. I had to lay down to keep from getting woozy. I avoided looking at the needle.
And then, it suddenly became less daunting (oh heeeeey Capability!) . . . and then they added a second injection to my mornings (wait, what?) I went right back to Courage.
Capability: By the 8th day, I had learned that icing my stomach was the trick. I started to even enjoy mixing the meds. I even grabbed my injection pack one day when I was late to an appointment (speed waddling to the car with an ice pack stuck down my stretch pants) so that I could inject myself on time. I mixed the meds while driving on the highway. Not recommending this, but you get my point.
Confidence: On day 12 they told me I’d need to continue injections for five additional days. I shocked myself by not feeling too distressed by this news and watching myself put in and pull out the needle during the injections! The remaining five days of shots were no big deal. I didn’t feel woozy or dread them. I just did them.
When I’m trying something new and I’m deeply uncomfortable I just tell myself, “I’m in courage.” I named my coaching business Courage to Answer because progress and growth are a constant choice: the choice to stay in the discomfort of courage because that is simply the process of progress.
My guess is you could map the four C’s onto breakthroughs and achievements in your life. What stage are you in today?
